I’m Somebody’s Mother

I’m Somebody’s Mother

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Most of the time I think about parenting from my own perspective – making decisions about how to best raise my kids. What’s the best way to potty-train? Am I striking the right balance of discipline and affection? Will I ever get my son to eat a vegetable?

But sometimes I stop and think about the relationship in reverse. It’s not just that my son and daughter are my kids. I am their mom. 30 or 40 years from now when my kid’s spouse/child/therapist asks what their mom was like, that person they’ll be talking is ME. Holy crap!

There are always these moments in books, movies and television where a character reflects on their mother – some oft-repeated piece of wisdom, the smell of her perfume, the swish of her skirt as she’d move around the house. I’m just picturing my kids, in contrast, wistfully recalling their mother’s messy mom bun and old ratty yoga pants Read more

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To the Partner of a Stay-at-Home-Parent: Four Truths you need to Understand

To the Partner of a Stay-at-Home-Parent: Four Truths you need to Understand

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So you’re the Partner of a Stay-at-Home Parent. Like most modern parents, you probably struggle to find the right balance between your work life and family life. The cliché of the man returning from work and putting his feet up and leaving all childcare responsibilities to the womenfolk has largely been left in the past. So I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you, POSAHP (do you mind if I call you that?), are an involved parent who sincerely tries to be as supportive as possible to your stay-at-home husband/wife/partner.

I’ve been blessed with an amazing POSAHP myself. He’s understanding, extremely involved with the kids, and a ridiculously good cook (I’m talking drool-worthy meatballs, y’all). But even if you are in the upper echelon of POSAHPs (which I’ll go ahead and assume you are since you’re reading my blog), there are certain realities of life as a SAHP that are just hard for you to fully grasp.

I certainly don’t claim to speak for all the SAHPs of the world, but I suspect that I’m far from alone in the struggles that have me wanting to pull my hair out by the end of the week (or halfway through Tuesday). So here are four truths that would be helpful for you to understand.

1) We Just Want you to Take the Kids

I know, I know – when you work full-time, you have a super limited window to get stuff done at home. Your weekend hit list may include mowing the grass, mulching, and reorganizing the garage. And all that stuff matters (I guess?). But I can almost guarantee Read more

Yes, I Know I Have a LuLaRoe Problem

Yes, I Know I Have a LuLaRoe Problem

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Recently at my neighbor’s house, her ten-year-old son asked a simple enough question, something to the effect of “what’s the deal with LuLaRoe – why is it so popular?”

In the span of just a few weeks last year, I went from only vaguely having heard of LuLaRoe to belonging to ten LLR Facebook groups and owning more pieces than I’d like to admit. So I have a thing or two to say about the brand’s appeal.

But I’m sure this young man was not expecting a twenty-minute monologue from his crazy, perpetually leggings-clad neighbor. So I kept my answer brief. But here’s how I could have responded to explain at least my own obsession with LuLaRoe (and I promise not to rhapsodize about the leggings feeling like a certain dairy product I dare not name).

After baby #2, I couldn’t fit into my old jeans but refused to buy new ones for what I hoped would be the temporary state of my body. I kept wearing my maternity pants, but Read more

It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye… to My Kid’s Nap

It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye… to My Kid’s Nap

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FreeImages.com/Carla Peroni

I can’t believe you’re really leaving for good. Sure, you’ve been showing signs that it was time to go. For the last few months we’ve been in limbo, doing that on-again, off-again thing. I’ve been trying to hold on to you, my son’s nap, but deep down I knew that our relationship couldn’t last forever.

You and I have had a good thing going for these last four years. Since the beginning, you’ve been there for me. Sure, you haven’t always been the most reliable partner. Sometimes you were glorious and lasted 2+ hours, while other times your presence was frustratingly brief. Regardless, you showed up day after day, and always made things a little brighter. I’m afraid I’ve never really taken the time to tell you how much you mean to me, so this message is really overdue.

In those early days, when my son would not let Read more

Birth Plans are BS

Birth Plans are BS

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“Complete your birth plan.”

Throughout my first pregnancy, I continued to avoid this item on my pre-baby to-do list. I had a million other things to worry about and it was the last thing I felt like dealing with it. But I eventually bit the bullet and looked into this birth plan thing.

A quick look at an online template had me instantly overwhelmed. Take, for example, the question about whether (among other options) I’d like labor augmentation:  first attempted by natural methods such as nipple stimulation, performed by membrane stripping, or performed with prostglandin gel.

I didn’t even know what the hell prostglandin gel was, much less Read more

A Mom Blog Confession

A Mom Blog Confession

I was scrolling through my Facebook feed yesterday, and saw an article with a title strikingly similar to my last blog post. I followed the link, and the post was strikingly similar too. The content itself was different, but the basic conclusion of the piece was virtually identical. This {bleep} ripped me, and now she’s going viral, I (very unkindly) thought to myself.

I followed the link to the original post to check the publication date, certain that I would catch the author red-handed. But there it was: Read more

No Mom, You Are Not Enough

No Mom, You Are Not Enough

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This one is for the wipers of runny noses…

For the sculptors of Play-Doh creatures,

the clippers of teeny tiny fingernails.

For the chefs of vegetables that go uneaten, the makers of countless PBJs,

the T-ball cheerers and team snack preppers.

For the answerers of questions mundane and philosophical,

the dramatic readers of dinosaur stories and princess tales.

For the dryers of tears and the kissers Read more